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Is this going to be rejected

Posted: Mon May 06, 2013 10:17 am
by BradB
It took a while to get my first article accepted. Once it was it sold in a few hours so I would like to do that again. I am working on a draft and would like to know if this is correct or not. I started off using the word "one" when referring to a person then switched to "you" as it becomes more relevant. Should I change this or do something else?

This is the first 2 paragraphs.

It seems everywhere one looks there are skinny fashion models sporting the latest looks and designs. It can be frustrating to those who do not fit into the ultra-skinny clothes that seem to be the rage. Who wears these clothes? If one looks around, there are not too many women who can fit into these styles. So what should a plus-sized woman do? Here are some hot fashion tips one can use to make your wardrobe look just as stylish and fashionable as the models that grace the covers of fashion magazines worldwide.

• Wear the size that fits your body. If your clothing is too big, it only makes your body look bigger. If it is too small, then it amplifies curves and will make one feel uncomfortable. Being uncomfortable in a garment will show even if you think you look fantastic.

Re: Is this going to be rejected

Posted: Mon May 06, 2013 11:07 am
by stelle
I'd switch from "one" to "you" right from the first line. "One" is much too formal for your topic, IMO.

Re: Is this going to be rejected

Posted: Mon May 06, 2013 12:00 pm
by SJHillman
As stelle said, use a second person writing style. Your secondary school English teacher might frown upon it, but it fits the slightly informal style of article writing. Think of your article as a speech or sales pitch that you're giving to a specific person or group (the reader) and use that as a basis of how to address the reader.

Re: Is this going to be rejected

Posted: Mon May 06, 2013 1:43 pm
by BradB
Thank you both for your advice. I will make a couple changes and submit